"The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life."- Richard David Bach
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Friday I'll be hitting the nine month mark...36 weeks. I know I haven't spared any of you the details of how uncomfortable I've been, how moody, or how I'm SO over this being pregnant stuff. But I thought I'd share more of my love with you. :)
The past three to four days, I've had it. I am over this! I know, I constantly hear, "Oh, it's almost over." Or, "You're not pregnant forever," or even, "The longer Baby D's in there, the healthier he'll be."
I know, all of the above comments are true, but to a mom who's mentally done, none of it is warranted as welcoming nor helpful.
I have the world's worst case of eczema under my nose/mouth area. Makeup hides the redness slightly, but seems to make the flareups worse. It peels, burns, looks horrific, and paired with the puffiness of my ever growing face and double chins, I want to cry.
And I do cry. Pretty much every single day.
I'm fat. Oh, don't say because I'm pregnant either. I see those pregnant moms out there who are just belly. Yes, just belly. I'm arms, legs, buttocks, (both cheeks) face, and even my once upon a time sexy calves that my husband adores (adored)...are now transformed into cankles.
I can't put socks on without getting stomach cramps. And forget trying to put on anything fitted. And if I drop something on the floor, it pretty much stays there unless it will stink if I don't pick it up or if it will cause harm to Lucas if he grabs it. So I take my foot and do a slide with the object...usually under the baseboard or out of my path's way.
I had the idea to camp out in my house for the next four weeks, but that's not obviously feasible.
I have given my children the warning already. I informed them that they will do not a thing right, good, or joyful to me or for me the next four weeks. I also informed Steve that he may want to just stay at work full time too. Yes, I'm this bad people. I really am.
Besides being exhausted upon waking, having an extra 33+ pounds added to my 5'4" frame, having fat distributed everywhere there's skin, being moody beyond moody, and crying because I'm over this, I'm generally stable with my surrounding conditions...what's left of them.
Each morning, I keep telling myself, which makes not a bit of difference, "Oh, I'm one day closer."
Today however, that mantra isn't working very well. I want to crawl back into bed, pull the covers over my head, and hope that the cramping of my uterus starts immediately followed by my water breaking! But until then, I will thank God for the blessing He has given me. And I will thank Him for the lesson I will finally learn. That being, no more children are going to come from me...promise!
I leave you with what does bring a smile to my face daily. I love this boy so much! Too bad Num-Num doesn't share the same love for him.